Kelly Clarkson Kellyville - Kelly Clarkson Quotes

"I'm not gonna lie, I'm frickin' hot! That could've been taken out of context, but whatever. I'm frickin' good-looking! I'm just kidding. It is, I'm so sweaty, I'm sweatin' like Ruben, it's real hot. "
"Let me tell you a secret, I totally just busted my lip on the mic (laughs) I've got the taste of blood in my mouth. i'm gonna keep marchin' on, don't worry! "
"(To Friend, Ashley Donovan) "You have love." (To Audience, about Ashley) "She's like 'it's too late for that now!'""
"*Drinks water* "Yeah I just hit myself in the mouth with the mic...that proves how smooth I am..Wooo and I had to take my jacket off cause man, its hot...man its hot here....HOLY CRAP ITS HOT HERE!!..and then we drove the bus cause we had a show in LA yesterday..and we got off of the air contioned car and we were like WHAT?! *looks around* ARE WE IN HELL?!?"
"Whitney Houston just got kicked off"
"Thats me looking really hot"
"I think I'm pretty cool. God made me this way for a reason. You know, big booty and I like to laugh. So, *laughs* those are my qualities."
"I know french canadians! Celine Dion!"
"Happy Single's Awareness Day!"
"I'm Fun! WHOOOOOO!!!"
"The cops are kicking us out of the park, cause were so gangsta!"
"Ummm this is my first- I'm not gonna start with 'ummm' cause that's bad. I learned that in public speaking."
"Im sorry I have like the most loyal fans in the world, so *laughs* theyre, yeah no, theyre awesome"
"Its good having someone my height"
"Good Morning."
"Who doesnt want to snog a prince"
"I'm feeling very Martha Stewart at this point of my life"
"I think I giggled the whole time like a school girl"
"Bye! Start Pedeling! "
"I should get a badge for that"
"you should never challenge the �clarkson� women, we always dominate �.it�s what we do. "
"Everyone has a booty!"
"they have definitely photo-shopped the crap out of me but i don�t care haha"
"Its good having someone my height! "
"You are a woman, and you are touching my leg. I like boys"
"From KC Productions"
"I complete you. Wait, it is you complete me."
"I am the director, you shut up!"
"Someone just nailed me with a pumpkin!"
"We love Jewish people!"
"koala bears doesnt have much fat....neither do i"
"There's probably nekkid people behind me. It's kinda a nekkid beach as well. Um, i wont be joining in that fun"
"Well, she's still hot, whatever. If you can pull that off, go for it. I like my hair. I'm keeping it. That's crazy"
"You want something different for your hairbrush in front of the mirror? You do that? I do that too. I'm 25 and I still do that"
"I''m not funny on command, I have to get jokes from people"
"My brother and I are like 10 years-olds with money"
"I have enough money. I'm not greedy. I want to make records that I enjoy singing"
"Oh, my God! I wrap the toilet with paper...it's a five minute process. Nothing on my skin is going to touch the toilet. People could have, like, nasty butt. And I do NOT use Porta-Potties"
"they say that sharks dont attack unless your in their terrioty and im like, huh, like the water"
"and i was like cute and he was like yeah and i was like OH your not kidding, thats sad"
"im frickin soakin wet, LOVE IT looooove it"
"my name is kelly tour clarkson"
"One that says screwed cuz i'm never gonna get married"
"I was like wow..thats sucks"
"I need to show my other skills"
"He's a hot sweetheart"
"Oh my mama used to mix egg salad with potato salad. She'd call it eggtato salad. And sometimes, she'd put potato chips in her tuna and make potuna salad. It was so good!"
"No one kisses like that at a wedding! Unless... whatever kind of weddings you go to, I don't know."
"This is a burrger king receipt!"
"if you were to look around my car you'd see tons of empty bottles of water."
"I try to like do the low rider thing with the seat reclined but I still look like such a midget"
"You know when you're walking by it and you bump into it and you're like 'op sorry'"
"I think I am only crazy if I answer myself, which I don't do."
"Oh dude I talk to everything. Like animals, things, like chairs."
"I have a ranger and I call it the Appollo because it feels like you're in a spaceship"
"We've got a fight"
"we're here to take your car well...if you can find it!"
"I don't say it like raah-eeet, faah-eeet"
"I had to hide my car from the repo people for a year"
"Just for sanity purposes i look at people and im like oh god i don't want to end"
"I think that music is always gonna change, but the one thing, its always gonna be"
"I gotta say i have the best dance so far, but thats okay"
"My big butt would scare yall"
"its a little intimidating yall are all pretty, So. every time i come here everyones"
"Is anyone's smile quivering yet?"
"I sing and write people...I don't know geography!"
"You just kinda Sink ( leans back in chair) and you laugh"
""I tried a space cake of space muffin, I giggled for like two days"
"I think i'm singing it wrong, I hope ya'll are singing it right!"
"RIGHT ON!"
"If the person next to you isn't up on their feet smack 'em. actually don't hit them... i don't promote violence, i promise!"
"Jesus drank. It came straight from the Bible that he had a glass of wine. Actually I dont know if it says he actually drank it, but Whatever"
"Hey.. oh theres a bug! I'm really scared of bugs! So if you see me running i'm not crazy!"
"My friend Ashley made me a compilation CD of all the booty songs from way back in the day, like junior high. It's titled booty medley."
"pose the booty? first, you point the booty at the camera, and your done!"
"Emma, my stylist, has been dressing me in Maggie Barry stuff lately because she fits curvy."
"mine might as well be fisher price!"
"I thank god everyday that you put up with my crazy butt!"
"Thank you to my kick butt fans you guys rock and I will never forget that!"
"it's way to early to be putting on hair and make up"
"I am awake I am just resting my eyes"
"I am going to destroy you and your camera"
"Make up Shmake up"
"Contacts Suck!"
"Am I talking too much? This little girl here is getting restless she is like shut up!"
"blah blah blah do I ever shut up"
"getting into the song, but what is up with my arm!"
"Being interviewed infront of my fans in Asia and Austrailia. Little do they know how much of a dork I am."
"I am showing my butt to my fans they are enjoying that. It's great"
"kelly are we twins? you are much cuter than I am honey but thank you for the compliment"
"if I see you sitting down don't think I won't come after you"
"this is called the trouble with WOOOO this is called the trouble with love is I love Montreal"
"you look pretty in a wig and a dress everywhere baby I'd take ya"
"so this next song was my second single I'm gonna need everyone up for this song it's Miss Independent Oh Wait no we are saving that!!"
"ok this next song is ... what? ... yes it is have you seen the show before? she has come to more than one show folks"
"I want to give you a special thanks for even coming to this show because last time I was here I fell on stage so thank you for even coming even though I am a cluz"
"you look like clay you have red hair and freckles I'm sorry you had to see my butt"
"do they don't wanna hear me sing they just want my autograph what is up with that? ...I promise I will sign your stuff...do you not have faith in me? I promise"
"you have to be guarded in this industry because you are well known and you have a lot of money so that is like a big red target"
"if someone around you is not sporting the green give them a pinch for me!"
"I got my green on for St. Patricks Day, do you have your green? ok you have green, you don't!! do you have green? Don't show me that!!"
"I'm not just tired. I had fun too!!"
"this song is where I got my start and I am kinda proud of this song cuz this is where I got my start you like that?"
"apparently I don't believe in hangers so I just throw everything down."
"pictures of me just goofing off because I am silly and stupid"
"hey I am just wondering is there any Clay fans here? I knew it would make you scream WOO"
"woo you're not gonna have a voice tomorrow"
"I am thankful for my momma and my daddy. You should be thankful for you momma and daddy too"
"let's give it up for all the people sitting up there since that's where I would be sitting"
"who is having a good time? wow there is a couple of ya'll that's good"
"I am preping you for Clay! GET UP ON YOUR KNEES"
"what's this? ooh I am gettin gifts on stage that's a horrible picture of me... wow I haven't hit makeup yet"
"I want to pose angry for a photo shoot so I can say Kelly didn't have her frosted flakes this morning"
"there was this one time that I um..... yeah I was trying to think of something but obviously I am not that quick"
"they think he is Jesus, I am a fan of Clay whatever but he ain't no Jesus"
"not just audio, video. Visual!!"
"I forgot we were doing the remixed version so I was singing the ballad version DORK!"
"shake it don't be scared if your mom is here I have allowed it"
"I hope they don't make my butt to big"
"I have to sit like a lady! I have to behave myself"
"I live with my brother except for I love my brother"
"nuts still on my salad!!"
"Then some magazine got a hold of it and was like 'Kelly obesity with the cake eatin all the cake!'"
"see look I am wearing more colours see you have to dress a little beachy and I said beach-y"
"I'm on the radio! "
"touring is not fun unless you have a tour buddy"
"Clay is sleeping in his bunk he is leaving all the work for me "
"it had a note on it that said enjoy and I was like what do we mean by enjoy like steal enjoy or mine enjoy"
"I am going camping so he can't call me, I will be in the middle of no where"
"ask him what he is allergic to... he is allergic to everything nuts, chocolate, mint, air, life..."
"Ask Clay a question? um.. hey what's going on?"
"What the heck is that thing? That says my name really fast! That's cool, you get cool points!"
"Look at his signature! His signature's so pretty! Mine's like hi I'm in fourth grade! "
"Marry me? Some popstar already covered that! I'm good"
"I just spit on myself I just thought ya'll should know"
"I just choked on water"
"Here she comes..squint girl! Comin right at ya! "
"*sings* I'm squinting again! "
"my flying powers only work on weds."
"I look like a girl scout! "
"you want a hug? unless you can fly up on here come on up"
"thank you because this song has been number 1 for 6 rows in a week"
"Now this day we had more than one sun, we had 3! "
"OOOH Scrabble I won the only game we played... Scrabble Queen ooh ooh ooh"
"there are pictures up on the screen.... yes screen I was right!!"
"oh I am going to break the table... er piano"
"She coached me in basketball, tried anyway! "
"no pressure.. don't suck"
"oh no don't cry stop that's contagious I have to sing!! oh don't STOP IT!!"
"ok my next song is called thank you or thankful am I here? oh my god where am I?"
"I see you I see you... ok I am not saying that on the mic I will lose my fanbase"
"I see a lawnmower sign so I am going to do it this is the lawnmower everyone, yes yes that's why I am still single"
"Ya'll can come pawty with us 'cause we're fixin to have a little pawty"
"This is called the trouble with love is and I have lots of trouble with it"
"Fans are the real reason why every artist is here. People forget that sometimes, but it's the one thing I'll never forget!"
"This song is called anytime and I promise we are only going to do it the one time"
"I am kicking every guy's crappy car off the cliff!"
"Oh my gosh! There's actual people out here!"
"No, girl, i'm livin' in Texas, i don't care how many times i have to fly, i need my roots, yeah!"
"Well I am the DJ so you're gonna have to deal with it"
"I want an Orange Dream Machine, even though it's got ice cream in it..I don't care"
"They showed the footage of my town on the show, and it's like, the lawn mower shop.. i didn't-- i didn't even know we had a lawn mower shop"
"But, in Texas, 350 miles is like right next door!"
"What's this? This maybe a fashion faux pas but I don't care. Look I'm blinking I'm blinking"
"I'm like 'Hey! My name's Kelly!..I'm selling thin mints, does anyone want some?"
"I was like, yeah, let's go! [Claps] Let's do some TRL moments and leave"
"I cry at like Hallmark commercials, people, I cry at everything"
"That was such a powernap"
"I need some kind of Bounce if you don't have no rhythm just try"
"I am so pumped. I could seriously like forget my words and just be like WOO, I dont care, I'm in Dallas."
"We're not like podunk. I showed up without shoes because i forgot them"
"What would I pose for? The Itty Bitty Titty Commitee?"
"I am thankful for god too but I don't have any recent pictures"
"I just dorked out"
"This thing keeps falling off me we need to glue it or tape it because it's not sticking"
"I'm not. But I do have six kids. No wait, I don't"
"You want a kiss? You're too far. My flying powers only work on Wednesdays!"
"You like that? I make sound effects too"
"Oh God, I think that's so cool. They probably think I, like, get upset about stuff, but I actually call my friends! I'm like, 'Dude! Get the National Enquirer! I'm in it!' Like, I'm in it, like, all the time now!"
"I'm gonna stop you right there. This is a pen, not a magic wand! Creepy old man? Yes. American Idol? No"
"Woo, It's hot in here, I am sweating like Ruben"
"If I'm like the girl next door, then y'all have some weird neighbors!"
"this feeling I felt for so long... I forgot the words to this song... someone help me out... you're not at the right place either"
"I'm a hygiene freak. I'm like obsessive-compulsive when it comes to washing your hands"
"I'm cute - and God I hate that. Because that's not cool. I'm like your niece, and nobody wants to date their niece. It's the chubby cheeks. The whole reason people voted for me on American Idol is because I'm an everyday, normal girl"
"Ya'll are already screaming do you know what it is? well then I am not going to give you a introduction"
"Nothing on my skin is going to touch the toilet; people could have like, nasty butt. And I do not use porta-pottie!"
"I want a cookie. Can I have a cookie? There's a brownie?"
"I can't wear that tight of pants. I like 'em flarier. Like, who likes straight legs? Not big butted girls. We need some big flares at the bottom, to match"
"I just didn't want to be like 'flash the world"
"Oh god, I was thinking thong, I was like 'I'm not gonna prance around in a thong!"
"On your feet, I see you"
"I was a real doofus when I finally got into a real recording studio"
"God, this job is hard. It literally sucks"
"I never said I was a 'good girl.' I'm not a bad girl. I'm just normal, and that's what I'm going to be. There's no bad girl with whips and chains that's going to come out. I think people like me because I was myself"
"For real, those kids could be animals! Listen! *opens car door and closes it* Maybe you didn't hear! *does it again* One more time!"
"Woohoo!"
"Chicken kung ky"
"Score!"
"If I can wake up everyday before I die and know that I don't have to serve anyone food or drinks, I will be happy! "
"I totally do not believe in backup plans. If you want something that bad...go for it! I knew that performing was what I wanted to do, so I went for it without a backup plan"
"Sexy man, sexy man"
""If you are not standing you are a party pooper! Get your booty up!" "
""Cool beans!" "
" "Ducka, ducka ducka" "
"wipe the sweat! wipe the sweat!"
"Nobody believes me! I wouldn't lie! People ask if I have a boyfriend and I laugh. I'm like 'yeah..in between eating and sleeping?"
"Yeah it made us look like the biggest podunk hillbillies ever!"
"I just remember watching it being terrified. It was all about sandcastles after that"
"You know coming into this nobody thought the show for one, I didn't think it was going to be that huge. And then nobody thought you know, you were going to be the winner. One out of ten thousand! What are the odds?? (thinks and realizes) One in ten thousand...how about them odds?!"
"That them there done good..no we don't talk like that!"
"What am I, a hick?? No, I'm not going to have hay at my wedding!"
"Oh my god, my thing is..I could die tomorrow.  Do I want to die on a diet? Am I going to meet God with an empty stomach?? Probably not-I'm going to meet him with some steak and taters in my stomach"
"I'd love to pose for a picture angry and it'd be like 'Kelly was upset because she didn't get her frosted flakes"
"oh Sh*t! Oh god..im sorry! Sorry for all the youngin's! I'm going to be in so much trouble for that (no you wont..) I soo am but thats OK"
"See..thats Kelly CLARKSON who would have done that, Kelly Taylor thats in the movie...she's a little too weak for my taste"
"I need this mic a little lower people, I'm only 5'3" I'm a soccer girl, not a volleyball girl. Woohoo for the short people"
"Things do get funny sometimes, though. The tabloids are the best. I think its so cool that they think i'm cool enough to write about. I just think it's funny."
"I was always taught thru church and my family that God will never give you something you can't handle..so don't stress."
"it's soo funny when people say its manufactured (American Idol) when indeed the show is about yourself. How many artists do you see go on national television every week...?"
"Its not like I'm showing people!"
"I'm not allowed to drink because of my vocal chords. I've had a few shots before. Liquor smells like crap. I hate when people said its an 'acquired taste' because I can aquire a taste for pee then, but I don't drink pee."
"Ive got a map! Ive also got a dolla!'"
"Somebody else needs to work the hose, cuz you bad at it"
"But in Texas, 350 miles is right next door"
"If my album came out right after [winning American Idol], it would not have been any representation of me..so they might as well called it <i>Not Me</i>"
"No he didn't shove it or anything. It wasn't like lellel (makes noise with tongue)"
"Well its tax day, so if youre broke..still go buy it!"
"I always get the youre like the girl next door type thing, and I find that funny because yall must have a lot of weird next door neighbors."
"Im Kelly Clarkson from American Idol in Burleson, Texas..I just said that wrong (sings) Aaaahhh (laughs)"
"Looks fade, but a charm and personality doesnt"
"I got into a fight once, It was in fourth grade-first day of school. This girl told me I was on her swing, and I beg to differ. But Im a lover, not a fighter."
"Is your dad a drug dealer? Cuz your dope! (Kellys fave pick up line)"
"I don't care about fame. I honestly don't give a flip. I hate limo's and I like going places by myself. My friends keep me level-headed. Being a star has never been a huge deal to me"
"Im a Wal-mart girl. You can buy everything there--CDs food."
"Be yourself. It sounds cliche and corny..but dont be Britney, dont be Chrsitina, dont be me."
"cause you know I eat a whole cake all the time by myself"
"Eww!! On so many levels...ew!"
"If I could whisper one thing to every fan, it would be Thank You, because I am only in this position because of my fans"
"I am NEVER going to change who I am"
"I didnt sport it because I lost it and ghetto kelly couldnt afford another one so I had to let the hole grow back in and get it pierced again."
"Im going on vacation...for four days! (holds up five fingers)"
"Im still going to eat burgers and fries, you can kiss my butt!"
"Im still the same dork that says DUCKA DUCKA DUCKA and SCORE, and I pray to God he doesnt change that."
"What? I cant have carbs now? Bread is good people. Jesus ate bread! How do you think I got these chubby cheeks and big butt"
"I wore my wrinkled pants to Rodeo Drive"
"I probably looked like a goober, but oh well!"